aSCENTsation

What to Wear on that Important First Date

Writing by forestthornbarg on Wednesday, 18 of November , 2009 at 5:37 am


So you’ve finally gotten around to asking that girl or guy out on a date and you really want to make a good impression, what should you choose to wear?

This was a dilemma that I recently faced as my wardrobe consists of a variety of jeans in various states of abuse, a collection of Rip Curl t-shirts and some almost worn out Vans Shoes trainers. I have a couple of crumpled old shirts, last worn for a funeral and job interview, a suit that was out of fashion when I bought it second-hand ten years ago and a pair of over-sized wellington boots that were won in a raffle. So I was wracking my brains. Was it time to go clothes shopping or could I borrow something suitable from a friend?

So I called in to see an old friend who suggested that I might borrow some of his fancy designer gear. The problem was build, I am quite small and he is enormous. All of his beautiful designer wear was simply far too big for me. I looked like a lad who’d been trying on his dads suits. I decided to pop over and see anothe good friend who is a bit closer to my small size.

My friend Kenny has a huge collection of clothes, and he is about my size. The problem is that Kenny is a flamboyant gay with a taste for garish, fluorescent colors and overly tight, stretchy clothes. He suggested that I wear a pair of his skin tight, bright green stretch trousers along with a bright orange t-shirt emblazoned with the slogan ‘Hello Big Boy’. I didn’t think that this would make the right impression with my date so I asked if he had anything else.

That was when Kenny said he had just the thing. A bright blue jumpsuit with a huge collar, studded with rhinestones. I asked Kenny if he was serious and he told me how this was the suit that had gotten him laid on a recent blind date. When I tried it on I looked like a really bad Elvis impersonator so this was not a good suggestion.

Then Kenny showed me another selection of clothes that he described as boring impulse buys that he had never actually worn. When I took a look inside the wardrobe I could see that these were far more suitable than the skintight fluorescent stuff that he had suggested. He had a collection of Nike ACG jackets that he had never worn because they were, in his words, too boring. There was a big pile of great looking jeans by Levis and Diesel along with tons of great looking shirts.

So Kenny came good with the loan of a great little outfit that I am pleased to report made such a good impression that my first date turned into a second and then a third. Since then I’ve been out and bought myself some new clothes and treated my friend Kenny to another painfully bright, tasteless t-shirt, just the way he likes them.

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